Birth Story #6 Jahyalo Jasmine

Earlier in the pregnancy my precious man Samoko brought home a gift, a beautiful flute that he said he thought would, “help with the birth” 

Well last Monday I entered the birthing portal… 

Contractions had that familiar change from Braxton Hicks (which had been intensifying for weeks) to the lower down cervical opening sensations that signal the first stage and required more of my focus and energy. 

Birthing time had begun…

And hubby was far away at work with youth in a detention centre, unable to access his phone until after sessions! 

Ahh!

I had known this could be a possibility so was prepared. Our plan was to freebirth baby at home (like their siblings before) and so I had made peace with having to potentially do that by myself if it happened quickly and Samoko wasn’t home.

I let some sisters know what was happening but that I felt fine for now. 

Then I told the kids. They were super excited 

Zakiya checked my birth plan list and started getting ready, tidying up, making the spaces clean and pretty. Raila wiped out the bath while Rahani and and Zawadi followed me around asking, “is baby coming now, is baby coming now??” 

 Which wasn’t super helpful. 

What WAS super helpful was that beautiful flute! 

I had noticed that playing it really calmed my being and seemed to slow down time. Lengthening my outbreath (to blow the instrument and make a sound) had a regulating effect on my nervous system and made waiting for papa (and baby) much easier. 

Playing outside, in the sunshine, I felt connectedness to the elements and ancestors. I felt my peace deepen and power grow… 

Video starring: me and my belly, Solar the cat, the sounds of various birds and ducks, plus Rahani’s super cute, “can I join you?” At the end…

Birth Portal Part 2:

So things were really warming up. I don’t time contractions or anything, never have. It feels good to let physiological labour progress in its own natural way, undisturbed. I know the act of measuring influences the field itself and so rather than trying to objectify or analyse the experience I choose to become and embody it. (This is just what works for me, full respect to people who like to measure/time and manage their births in a different way.)

So, I wasn’t timing contractions, yet I instinctively knew these tightenings and expansions we’re getting stronger and closer together as the day flowed on. I breathed and moved, played and rested as I felt to, while connecting my body and baby in surrender and trust.

Luckily Sam checked his phone on a break and started the journey to come home. Phew! 

Kids were still being their awesome selves. We made food, did chores, waited for daddy to get back and knew we would probably have a new baby by the next morning. How exciting!

There was a lovely surprise outside as we saw one of the fancy hens (the blue/green egg laying Eliza) had hatched two cute little chicks. I took it as a good omen and had a laugh sending “babies here” to a few people with a slightly delayed photo of the baby chicks,

 mwahaha !

Papa got home near sunset and I felt a big sigh of relief. My lover, co-creator and seasoned birth space provider was back, hooray! While I trusted that I could, I didn’t really want to do this without him 

So we got to work making sure everything was ready and found some extra firewood to make it warm for baby’s arrival. After dinner everyone helped to smudge the house and make a birthing altar with crystals, feathers, deities, birthing beads, magic and some beautiful rainbow candles they had made the day before at the Steiner festival. 

I felt the rushes of oxytocin – the delicious birthing love hormone – as the candlelight flickered on the faces of my precious family. 

I gave thanks. How blessed we are! 

Then, time to get the little ones to bed. Contractions came on stronger as I lay down to help Zawadi sleep. I thought I was keeping her awake with moving around but then noticed she was breathing deeply along with me and soon she was in the land of dreams. Papa helped Rahani to sleep then we sat by the fire with Zakiya and Raila for a while. They asked to be woken up when it was time for baby to come. We agreed and told them to get some rest because baby would probably come in the middle of the night. 

I could tell that Samoko, hero though he is, was pretty tired. He had driven to Brisbane at 4am that morning and it was now 8.30pm. I knew I was still in the first stage of labour and that I could probably slow things down now that everyone was asleep. “Ok, two hours rest then we’re on” I said. He agreed and lay down by the fire. 

I focused on my breathing. Deep breath in, long slow breath out. My body opening gently and slowly. I felt baby go back to sleep and decided I would try as well. I had a few micro-naps in between contractions and remember dreams of watery wonder. I was up and down to the toilet, yes getting closer now I knew from previous births. I spent some time outside with the waning (but still very bright and round) moon. The smell of jasmine strong in the air. 

Birth Portal Part 3:

By 10.30pm I could no longer lay down. Papa felt it and got up too. We spent some time connecting; warm oil, tender touch, silent support, gratitude and reassurance for one another and our roles in this experience. 

The fire was hot and the bath ready to be filled. Sensations intensified and my sounding became instinctive. Low, deep noises echoing from a primal place. I LOVE physiology and know that my jaw and vocal chords are connected to my pelvic floor. The more I can relax my mouth and voice, the easier my pelvic muscles relax and allow baby to move down and through. 

Once the sounds begin to arise and lengthen with each contraction/expansion I know that second stage is coming near so I asked Sam to wake Zakiya. She had been present for the birth of Zawadi three years before but I knew she was older and wanted to be more involved this time. 

Zaki woke up and joined us in the living room where the special indoor bath had been set up near the fireplace. This bath is special because it is the same one Zakiya was born into 12 years earlier! Papa built a stand for it and now it can be moved anywhere we like 

With perfect doula vibes my firstborn daughter held space beautifully. Full presence in the experience, learning and healing natural generational cycles, yet not taking energy away. 

A few more waves of sound and motion moved through me. I was straddling the point many call ‘transition’, consciousness expanding in two worlds. The potential for a ‘wobble’ of faith, that i met with deep inward focus and trust in my body and baby as we dance the journey of birth. 

Sam filled the bath and at 11.11pm I got in. 

The warm water intensified sensations. It felt so good! Zakiya made me laugh by saying I sounded like the mummy whales 

 (we had watched a doco about their migration recently)

and also like a tiger.

She told me later that she was surprised the other kids didn’t wake up with my hums and roars and growls. 

This second stage felt different than previous births, it was a little slower and I needed to be much more active. I shifted from kneeling on all fours to squatting to laying back in the bath, cycling through each of these positions many times. I was instinctively working with our baby to find more open positions so that she could travel through the portal of my body and out into the world. In moments of relaxation my beautiful man held my head and shoulders and stroked my hair.

The magical hormones of birth were flowing strongly. I was smiling and laughing, enjoying the ecstasy of bringing baby earthside. 

I am forever grateful having my eldest daughter to witness and capture some of these moments (even though it was dark). In our fourth freebirth this is the first time we have a photo together.

Birth portal part 4:

“I just saw my three grandmothers all together” said Samoko from beside the bath. I pictured their faces, smiles and laughter, the stories I had heard and the homes we had visited. 

I acknowledged the long lineages of women behind and in front of me. Ancestors of the past and future, birthing babies and the old/new earth in cycles of space and time. With eyes closed I could sense the energy spiraling all around us. With eyes open I saw golden wisps of light, like tiny angels, as steam rose from the water. I was inhabiting the liminal space of both’no-time’ and ‘eternal-now’. I smiled at my daughter, on the edges of young womanhood herself, witnessing this sacred feminine rite of passage.

I “ohm-ed” loudly as baby crowned, the resonance flowing from my mouth and baby flowing through my body. Gentle yet powerful. Opening, stretching, opening. Then the head was born, soft hair waving under the water. Next a hand, arm and shoulder (this presentation explains the slower descent and different feeling compared to my other births). One more big “OHMMM” and the other shoulder followed by the body. 

“Baby’s out!” I exclaimed with joy.

There she was floating peacefully under the water. A perfect little being grown in my belly and now swimming in the bath, still receiving oxygen though her umbilical cord attached to the placenta still in my womb. Samoko and I looked at eachother, taking in the moment. Then I lifted her out and saw she was very lively. Full tone, kicking her legs, wise eyes wide open. 

“Hello precious baby” I cooed and kissed her. Then putting her in a drainage position and rubbing her back she gave a hearty cry. Breathing well. 

“You’re perfect!” I told her and closed my eyes giving thanks. 

“Welcome to Earth on the outside of my womb.” 

“It’s 11.33” said papa.

We stayed in the bath for a long time. She liked the warm water and would calm and relax when I floated her in it. The air was warm too with the fire blazing behind us. Zakiya and Sam stayed close and Raila woke up to come meet his new little sister too. She was covered in creamy white vernix which confirmed my dates and that she was probably around 10 days ‘early’, though I believe and trust babies come in their own time anyways.

The warmth of the water allowed the cord to continue pulsing for longer, nourishing baby with all the blood and iron and energy from her placenta. After a while we got out of the bath and Zakiya held her littlest sister while I squatted to birth the placenta. It wasn’t ready yet so I lay down on the couch. 

Baby was poking out her tongue, mouthing a signal that she was hungry. I offered the breast and she latched on easily. I felt this stimulation cause my uterus to contract again. Another hooray and giving of thanks for the beautiful design of nature and creation, of which we are so blessed to be. 

Then came the grape juice, warm herbal teas and hot water bottles. Over an hour after babe was born I sensed placenta ready too. I guided it out and felt the sweet relief of completion. A few fresh gushes of blood so i popped babe back on the boob and massaged my womb. I could feel it was tightening but I took some shepherds purse to assist the process. I rubbed my belly and celebrated the amazing job it has done. I stroked baby and gazed in gratitude at our beautiful home and family. Waves of love, oxytocin-rich, filled my heart. We went to sleep, now a family of 7. 

#birth #freebirth #naturalbirth